I wonder...

This past week I've been reading the different accounts of the last week of Jesus' life. I love seeing how the 4 Gospels tell the story. As I have been reading, I've thought about Mary a lot. As a mother, I can not imagine for one second what it was like for her as she watched her son suffer. I don't like hearing my boys cry after they bump their heads. What was it like for her as she watched her son be crucified. It makes me tremble just thinking about it. I've caught myself wondering about some of the things that might of crossed her mind and heart.

I wonder if she thought about the day the angel told her she was going to have a baby came to her mind as she watched her son come into Jerusalem on a donkey?

I wonder if she thought about the quiet days of his birth as she watched the huge crowds celebrate the arrival of Hosanna.

I wonder if she remembered the day that she and Joseph found Him teaching in the synagogue. It must have been a very special moment as she watched Him living out His purpose...even at a young age.

One of my favorite verses is Luke 2:51..."But his mother treasured all these things in her heart." I think God knew that there would come a day when Mary was going to need the comfort of her memories. I'm finding that God does the same for us today. My journey into motherhood didn't look like others. I wasn't chosen to carry my children in my womb. But I was chosen to be their mother. The highs and lows of our journey are all treasures that I hold in my heart.

Last night, I had a conversation with Zachary that I am adding with my other heart treasures. Here's how the conversation went...

Zachary: "Mama, let's talk about our family."
Me: "Okay...what do you want to talk about?"
Zachary: "How did God make our family."

Me: "You know this story, but I'll tell you again. For a long time, your daddy and I prayed and asked God to put a baby in my tummy...just like there is a baby in Aunt Aimee's tummy. But God didn't do that because He had a different plan."
Zachary: "God didn't put me in your tummy?"

Me: "No. God put you in a different mommy's tummy." After you were born, you went to Grammy and Pappa's house. One day daddy and I went to Grammy and Pappa's house and we saw you and Daniel. We knew right away that you and Daniel were our babies. Your daddy and I loved you so much. We prayed and asked God to make us a family. And you know what happened next?

Zachary: "Yes! God said we could be a family and me and Daniel came to our house."
Me: "That's right! The day God made us a family was the best day ever."
Zachary: "And then we saw the judge."
Me: "Right."

After a little silence, Zachary shared his heart with me. These words will be held in my heart forever...

Zachary: "Mama?"
Me: "Yes?"
Zachary: "When I was in the other mommy's tummy, I missed you."
Me: (with tears in my eyes) "I missed you too."