"So...how's the adoption coming?"

That is the million dollar question. If there is one thing that I have learned over the past year is that NOTHING moves quickly when it comes to foster/adoption situations. We have been in the process of adopting our boys for the past 18 months and we aren't finished yet. Before I share where we are in the process, let me share my limited understanding of the process when adopting through the state. Be warned...this will be long!
Step 1: kids are placed in foster care. This is called a foster placement. CPS works through a billion steps and if the moon and stars align just right (sorry for the sarcasm!) and it's in the best interest of the child, the parents rights will be terminated.
Step 2: if the foster parents aren't intending on adopting the kids, then another family is selected. the kids are then placed with a foster family that is wanting to adopt. This is also a foster placement.
Step 3: this is where it gets tricky. In the state of Texas, (and maybe other places, I just know about Texas) if a family is adoption a "sibling group" (more than one related child at the same time i.e. brothers) then there is something called adoption subsidy. It is a monetary amount that the adoptive family receives to help with expenses. The amount is negotiated based on the needs of the children and will be the set amount for 4 years. There is a A LOT of paperwork. The money is used to cover everything from extra services should the children need any kind of therapy, counseling, expenses for keeping contact with the biological family(if the court says they can have contact) etc. This amount must be negotiated before the adoptive placement is made.(see Step 2) The reason for this is that once the adoptive placement is made, it's VERY hard to get the subsidy. It's in the best interest of the family to make sure this is agreed upon before moving forward. Once this is decided, the kids and parents are labeled as an adoptive placement.
Step 4: CPS has a formal presentation of the family and the adoption is set in motion
Step 5: Have the family's attorney contact the court house and schedule a court date.
Step 6: Everyone goes to the courthouse, sees the judge, sign some papers, get new birth certificates (YEAH!) and have a party! :)

That is the short and sweet version. There are about 15 little sub-steps in between. The kids have to have psychological evaluations, current doctor/dentist visits, loads of paperwork...I can't think of what else right now. So...you might ask...what step are we on. Well, after 18 months of foster care with one family, Step 1 was completed in April 2007. On May 30, 2007 Step 2 was started when Sean and I were selected as the boys adoptive home. Notice, I didn't say adoptive placement. Remember, subsidy has to be agreed upon. The boys moved in on June 5th. Since then we have done the psychological evaluations, medical visits, monthly visits from 2 different caseworkers, secured an attorney (who we love by the way!) and mountains of paperwork. We submitted our part of our subsidy request in October. Now, we wait.

And wait.

And wait some more.

Still waiting...

To answer the question, we are stuck somewhere in Step 3. We are having some trouble getting in contact with the state agency that handles the subsidy part of our case. They've had our paperwork since October but have yet to contact us. We make lots of phone calls, our attorney makes phone calls and our foster worker makes phone calls. We're not sure what the hold up is. Sean has his theory for the hold up but that is for another post. :)

The answer to the question "how's the adoption coming" depends on the day. If it's a good day I'll say "it's fine. the boys are doing great and were moving along." If it's a day when I've had the run-around on the phone I'll say, "it's fine. the boys are great and we're just needing someone to give us some answers." It's on those days that Sean reminds me that the important thing is that the boys are with us, they're healthy, happy and growing like weeds. They aren't going anywhere! We have been so blessed to have them in our lives. It's very hard to remember what life was like when it was just Sean and I. :)

I was reading some old journals the other day and God brought me back to some of the entries from this time last year. It was looking very dim and hopeless that we would get the boys. God gave us so many wonderful promises and such a deep peace that He was in control. I needed to be reminded of that. I made a decision that the next time someone asks how the adoption is coming along I'm going to say, "Just fine. It's exactly where God wants it to be right now."